she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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