I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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