Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
