when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
