You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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