if you like me you must not know who I am
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
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