We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
What a dumb baby whore.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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