thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
