It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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