If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
