Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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