Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize