pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
