i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Randomize
