just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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