My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
