Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
