I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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