Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
