so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
