On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
