Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
