it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
