their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
