we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
