you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
