I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
