once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
No subtext here. People are naked.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I forget how to act sober
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
