He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
