I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize