so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
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