i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Randomize
