Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
