I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Randomize
