you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
