Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
