spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
