I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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