i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
