Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
