What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
