i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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