what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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