last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
