Apparently you make a good broom.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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