Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
