Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Randomize