And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
