I'm really into asian looking animals
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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