I wish i was in the wii world.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
