I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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